Does your child act out or tantrum during a haircut? As a mother of an adolescent child with autism, I can certainly identify with those of you whose children do not tolerate haircuts very well. This article will hopefully lead to more tantrum-free haircuts.
As our son reached his first birthday and beyond, his hair began to grow longer. I would braid his hair twice a week. Eventually, he would lie down on my lap falling asleep while I braided. He wore his hair this way until shortly after his third birthday.
With all the combing and braiding, we were quite surprised to discover after his first haircut at age three, that our son had become highly sensitive to anyone or anything touching his head.
At this time, we didn’t know yet that our son had autism. We did know he had a speech delay. He was also beginning to show some really odd behaviors. For example, he began behaving like our new puppy, and became fascinated with our steam iron.
Mostly he was a happy toddler, easy to please and smiled often. At age three he began communicating any unhappiness to us with a long, loud and high-pitched scream. By this time he did not talk at all, never pointed and would walk around our house clutching a plastic coat hanger.
He began closing any open doors, turning the lights on and off, and lining his toys up in a single row. Screaming loudly, he would tantrum if you dared to move any of his toys out of place.
We came to realize he was now also highly sensitive to certain noises. Low humming and high-pitched sounds made him very anxious and uncomfortable. While he was actually attracted to other loud sounds, like our garden tractor.
Years later, we learned he is hyperacusis in his right ear, and borderline in his left ear, meaning he has a hypersensitivity to sounds.
He was now also sensitive to light and needed to wear sunglasses or at least a sun visor whenever he was outdoors. He began blinking his eyes rapidly before having a meltdown. Later when he learned to talk, he told us he was ‘making lightning’.
Our son has many sensory issues. He has trouble sitting still and following directions during haircut time. He would become non-compliant and resistant, covering his head with his hands, moving his head quickly from side-to-side, and would cry.
Over the years our son has been to many different barbers. Some of them were more patient with a difficult young client than others.
Sometimes while getting a haircut he would grab your hands or even try to smack you away from him. Often times, it would take at least two of us to manage the situation.
Mostly these sessions would grow worse, and ultimately lead to a full-blown tantrum, or meltdown. His barbers usually found these behaviors to be way too stressful. Eventually it became obvious that both our son and the barbers were miserable whenever we bought him in for a haircut.
My husband believing he had no choice, finally took on a new ‘trade.’ He learned through trial and error how to cut our son’s hair. These experiences were filled with nervous tension. They were terribly stressful and unpleasant times for all of us.
Time and experience soon taught us how to prepare our son to get a haircut. Then later, learn to tolerate a haircut without having a tantrum or meltdown. Today haircuts are readily accepted by our son as part of his bi-weekly grooming routine.
Sensory Problems and Autism
In Autism Spectrum Disorders, the brain seems unable to balance the senses appropriately. It is common for a child with autism to have sensory problems. He may be hypoactive (low sensitivity) or hyper-reactive (high sensitivity) or lack the ability to combine the senses.
Autistic children often have a “fight or flight” response to sensation. This condition is called “sensory defensiveness” and may be diagnosed as a “sensory processing disorder.”
A child with autism can be sensitive to many things, like the noise clippers make, the sensation of cutting hair, feeling loose hairs on their body, seeing hair fall on their clothing, or even the floor. Our son told us it also hurts to get a haircut.
When children’s perceptions are accurate, they can learn from what they see, feel, or hear. On the other hand, if sensory information is faulty, their experiences of the world can be confusing. Many autistic children are highly attuned or even painfully sensitive to certain sounds, textures, tastes, and smells.
Sensory integration therapy may help desensitize a child. This type of therapy can be provided by an occupational, physical or speech therapist, helping a child to better rearrange his sensory information.
We have found ‘desensitizing’ our child to be key to a tantrum-free haircut and wish to share our ‘tried and true’ ideas and tips with you.
Remember to take long, deep breaths and try to be really patient. Don’t worry, you will do fine.
Best wishes and good luck!
Tip #1
1. Take each haircut session one at a time. Observe your child, take notes if necessary. You will learn more about your child each time.
Tip #2
2. Buy a good quality home haircutting kit. Look for clippers with blade guards to avoid cutting the hair too short.
Tip #3
3. Use unscented shampoo and conditioner if your child is sensitive to smells or odors. African-American children may use hair pomade or other scalp conditioner to moisturize the hair. Before you begin a haircut wash the hair to remove any hair products build-up. Cutting clean, dry hair with clippers is much faster. The hair will cut easier. Some children do not like having their hair washed. Our son will not lean his head all the way back. So we began washing his hair with a sudsy shampoo on a washcloth, and rinse using a washcloth damp with clear water. We would condition his hair the same way. Now he is able to wash his hair on his own.
Tip #4
4. Schedule a haircut when your child is least likely to be ’sensory overloaded’ or feeling overwhelmed by the information he is taking in through the five senses: hearing, vision, touch, smell and taste. Try to avoid scheduling haircuts after school or when your child is ill or tired. Our son appears to be most autistic in the morning. So we do not plan to cut his hair then, preferring to do it later in the day.
Tip #5
5. For a child that is sensitive to the buzzing noise of the clippers or the repeated ’snap’ of a scissor, try using soft, flexible ear plugs. Does your child like to sing? Sing a song. Play some of their favorite music.
Tip #6
6. Develop a routine for haircuts. Does your child need a haircut or trim every week, every other week or monthly? Try to schedule them for the same day of the week and time of day whenever possible. For example, every other Saturday morning. Be consistent.
Tip #7
7. Think of a few activities, toys or food your child really enjoys to use as his special reward or bonus. What does he like to do? What makes him happy?
Tip #8
8. Explain to your child exactly what you are planning to do during the haircut. Use short sentences and/or visual supports using personal pictures or icons. Take a picture while your child is getting a haircut. Take a picture of all the items used. You may also use icons or PECS.
Tip #9
9. Be sure your child has a cape, sheet or towel draped over him. Our son hates having any hair fall on his face, body or clothing. He covers his face with a hand towel to keep those fine, cut hairs off his face.
Tip #10
10. Under supervision allow your child to handle the clippers and other items used for the haircut. At home, allow him to help you prepare for it. For example, the child gets a towel, and the comb or brush. Teach him how to clean the clippers. For example, brush off any loose hairs from the blade and oil the clippers. This can be a good motivator and is fun.
Tip #11
11. Observe your child while cutting his hair. Is there anything in particular he dislikes or finds intolerable? If so, try to make it better.
Tip #12
12. Allow your child to give an old doll or teddy bear a haircut while their own hair is being cut. This may help your child learn to generalize the experience. You or the barber can also use the doll or teddy bear to demonstrate what it is you need or expect your child to do. For example, act out directions to ‘turn your head to the right’ or ‘bend your head down.’ These are strong visual cues and may be better understood.
Tip #13
13. Unless your child is better able to tolerate a haircut, keep their hairstyles simple. For example, ‘fades’ and ‘parts’ may take longer to cut. Try the ‘Caesar’ style which is a low even-blended cut all around the head.
Tip #14
14. Focus on the task at hand. Try to cut hair as fast as you can without rushing. For example, do not dawdle. Try not to stop cutting hair to talk to others, in person or on the phone.
Tip #15
15. Edge the front, sides and nape of the neck first for a ’shape-up’ then cut the hair. Should your child not tolerate a haircut before you or the barber is done, a shape-up will give him a clean, fresh haircut look, even if the hair has not been entirely cut.
Tip #16
16. Reassure your child during the haircut. Explain each step of the way in a slow, steady voice. For example, ‘Good job keeping your head still.’ ‘All done, after…’ Let your child know that the is near. This step may be faded out gradually as your child becomes familiar with the process.
Tip #17
17. Once the haircut is done, admire your child’s clean-cut appearance. ‘You look handsome!’ Show him how he looks in the mirror, if tolerated. Take before and after photos so they can see the benefits. Use this opportunity to begin to teach him how to comb and brush his own hair.
Tip #18
18. Remember to give your child a reward or bonus that he will enjoy. Give your child a choice for their bonus. A reward or bonus will show him that although we must do unpleasant things sometimes, at other times we get to do things that we enjoy.
Tip #19
19. At home, use this opportunity to teach other daily living skills, particularly hygiene and grooming. For example, your child may learn how to undress/dress, shower or take a bath independently (run his own bath water at the right temperature, wash his body properly, determine how long to stay in the shower or tub, clean the shower/tub, put his dirty clothes away, use deodorant, choose an appropriate outfit to wear, etc.
Tip #20
20. Other lessons and tasks on daily living activities may be expanded in time as appropriate. For example, your child may help put items away, clean and oil the clippers, sweep or vacuum hair off the floor, put their dirty clothes and towels in the hamper or washing machine. Learn to sort laundry, load and wash his clothes, put clothes in the dryer, fold clothing, learn to iron, etc.
Parent Resources
Click here to read more about a child with autism, find information on autism, autism treatment, autism medication, autism resources, autism symptom, sign of autism, autism characteristics, autism aspergers, autism statistics, history of autism, autism education, autism schools, teaching child with autism, autism in the inclusive classroom, autism support group, autism awareness, adult with autism, autism picture and autism help.
Additional Resources
Below is a list of books, articles and useful products we use to learn how to help our son become better able to process sensory information and grow to better tolerate getting haircuts, and become more independent.
Books on Sensory Integration
The Out of Sync Child
by Carol Stock Kranowitz
ISBN: 0-399-52386-3
The Out-of-Sync Child Has Fun
(Activities for Kids with Sensory Integration Dysfunction)
by Carol Stock Kranowitz
ISBN: 0-399-52843-1
Books on Activity Schedules and Visual Supports
Activity Schedules for Children with Autism
(Teaching Independent Behavior)
by Lynnn E. McClannahan, Ph.D. & Patricia J. Krantz, Ph.D.
ISBN: 0-933149-93-X
Making Visual Supports Work in the Home and Community
(Strategies for Individuals with Autism and Asperger Syndrome)
by Jennifer L. Savner & Brenda Smith Myles
ISBN: 0-9672514-6-X
Videos to Help Your Child Learn in Their Natural Environment
Model Me Kids: Videos For Teaching Social Skills by Peer Example
Developmental Products to Help Teach Life Skills
Visit Attainment Company and http://www.attainmentcompany.com/AB1031005/showprod.cfm?&DID=11&CATID=3&ObjectGroup_ID=8&AF_ID=49“> click here for Life Skills
Free or Low Cost Materials
Do 2 Learn offers free picture icons you can download to make visual schedules and to-do lists for your children.
Articles
Home Activities for Children with Sensory Processing Disorder offers parents good ideas for incorporating sensory input into daily activities.
Parent Networking and Support
Sensory Integration Dysfunction
Sensory Integration Disorder Group
About the Author
W.R. Brown is wife, mother of four children, grandmother, volunteer, presenter at parent support groups, member of local autism support groups, national autism organizations, former legal assistant, service coordinator, served as Board member to non-profit organizations, autism Advisory Groups, appeared on Cable 6 TV and XM Radio One.
